Goodbye 2007

Here's some things that happened in 2007, however, in no real order, just more in order of what I remember:

• I turned 16 on June 16th (Sweet sixteen and golden birthday; even though it was not very exciting, it came and went and now it's gone)
• I went to St. Louis for the Nazarene Youth Convention
• I went to prom with Bradley
• I spoke in church a couple times in the evening
• I got my Local Minister's License
• I finished my sophomore year and started my junior year in high school
• I went to a Kutless/Newsboys concert
• I worked in the grocery store/Southside in the summer
• I started bowling on league on Thursday nights (whenever I can now, though, because of basketball games on Thursday)
• I, along with the basketball team, got snowed in Ashley and had to spend the night in the Ashley gym
• I got elected for my third year on the youth board
• I spoke at AfterShock '07 without any notes or real preparation
• I fainted in the shower and had to go to the ER and get staples in my head (and the hole in the bathroom wall is still there, whoops)
• I learned how to order at Subway all by myself (without Trevor working and what not)
• I went to camp and cried, learned, and have fun
• I learned it's a bad idea to fall asleep outside and get your knees sunburned
• I learned all over that life goes on
• On March 5, 2007, I forgave my father
• I served at the Community Christmas dinner
• I helped with a can drive
• I rejoined quizzing
• I learned a lot about myself and though I can't really see it, I grew up a little more
  
• I had fun and enjoyed 2007

"Trust, why is our trust faded?
Jesus says to trade them
Trade our scars for his promises
So give him all your love this time
And give him everything you are this time
You’ve never been so lucky
To have a friend like Jesus
Wait, how long will you wait here?
Your life longs for a new year
Your healing must begin somewhere
Everything you could ever want
Is right before you
He is close to your broken heart
You’re right where you should be"
-This Beautiful Republic, New Year

Bring on 2008...

Movies and Alfred

"It's not the end
The end of the world
It's just another day
Depending on grace
It's not the end
The end of the world
It's just another day
Don't sleep it all away"
-Matthew West, The End

I should stop posting when it's late. It's almost tomorrow. I don't know if I want it to be tomorrow. Tomorrow is the last day of 2007. That's down right scary, isn't it? I should learn to handle change and the future better. I really should.

My mom and I just got done watching two Alfred Hitchcock movies, Stage Freight and Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and they were both pretty good. Mr. and Mrs. Smith is nothing like the new one, like at all, not that I've seen the new one, but my mother has and she says they are nothing like each other. I like spending time with my mother. It's weird how much shorter the credits are for movies back in the day. I like Alfred Hitchcock movies. They are good. I like black and white. It's classic-er or something. I like movies. Although, ever since Mrs. Foote made us do that movie unit in English, I can't watch movies anymore without thinking about camera angles and reaction shots, it's like I can't just watch a movie anymore, I start to think about the meanings behind everything. It's ruined my movie watching abilities. I'm not even kidding you. I used to be able to watch a movie and then I would walk away with the enjoyment of a movie. But now, I think about how the camera looked down at the actors creating vulnerability. Or like I would start thinking, "man, that's a nice reaction shot." Of course, after watching Mr. and Mrs. Smith, I was just really thinking that the wife was a little nutty, okay, not just a little. A whole lot of nutty. A fruitcake, like my mother said.

I am trying to get this post done so it still has today's date. Ha, ha. I suppose then I should stop typing. I don't really have much more to say that wouldn't just be completely random. Well, I suppose I have two random things I could end with:

1. Which came first, the incense or the old man smell? (That's really from a conversation Trevor and I had a little while ago.)

2. It's not nice to make fun of a person who combines slanted and ramp and says, "slamp." It's just not nice. It's not how you make friends.

Becoming Who I Am

Friday night I worked at the bowling alley. Dick left a wrench on the table that I could totally have used for protecting myself in case someone came in to attack me. However, my reflexes are awful and so every time my friend said someone was coming in, I didn't grab for the wrench right away. Ha, ha. Anyway, a friend came to visit me. Not to bowl, although I was told that I could still bowl if I wanted, but I left my shoes in my car, but just for a visit. It reminded me that this friend, despite not always getting along, and even though he's only in Aberdeen for college, we don't always talk much, but we still get along pretty well and are still friends. Anyway, this friend made me think. Trust is an important thing. People need to be trusted, and even if we start out neutral with everyone we meet, there's no reason to not trust them right away.

He also told me that I'm too forgiving. But, living and forgiving must go hand and hand. In growing up, I've learned that people will always hurt you. Maybe that's too cynical, but friends, family, strangers, anyone in your life will hurt you one time or another, whether it's something big and important or not. You'll get hurt. That's why if you never forgive people, then you will spent your life lonely because you don't forgive anyone and you'll push them all away. Honestly, I have yet to be able to not forgive someone. Seriously, I've forgiven my father. I didn't think I would ever be able to do that. But, Jesus forgave my sins. I think I can at least forgive others. (See Ephesians 4:32 which says, "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.")

"We think the thoughts whether or not we see them through
And I know that I have been forgiven
And I just hope you can forgive me too"
-Relient K, Forgiven

As for today, I went to Minot for a quiz. I didn't do too well. I'm told I shouldn't go into it already thinking I've been defeated. Which is totally what I did. I don't know why. The only times I got any questions was when I didn't start out thinking I wouldn't get anything. Did that makes sense? Ha, ha. It made sense to me. I mean, I know quizzing isn't about the points, but it's like I told my mom. I want to do quizzing this year. (I quit last year in December, it's like I told Brad, I'm a bad quitter, I rejoin after I've quit.) I love Philippians, but I need an attitude change. I love having all the past verses I've memorized in my head, and I want to get excited about the Word. I want to get to the point where I am yearning to learn more, to the point where without the Word, I'm hungry for it. I'm not there yet, but that's where I want to be.

"I keep on learning the hard way from every mistake
and I’m finding each time that you fall, you’re just becoming who you are"
-Mainstay, Become Who You Are

I'm still becoming who I am. Who I am as a person and who I am as a believer in Christ. However, one thing I do think about life:

"I’m Sunny with a high of 75
Since you took my heavy heart
And made it light
And its funny how you find you enjoy your life
When you’re happy to be alive"
-Relient K, High of 75

It's Late

"Jesus says to trade them
Trade our scars for his promises"
-This Beautiful Republic, New Year

Without even meaning to, I have made two situations very ironic. I didn't mean to. I mean, sure, it makes life more funny whenever irony is around, but I did not realize I was inviting the irony into my life.

Other than that, Christmas lasted a little bit longer than expected. I received an unexpected present from a friend. That's really more my brother's friend/family friend, but still a friend nonetheless. It was uber nice and unexpected, but welcomed still. Actually, I felt bad that I had nothing to give in return of this basket of gifts galore. My mother told me not to feel bad, because this gift was intended to bring joy. I am very happy and grateful. And not just because I got a present, but also because I know this person and this person is in my life.

It's late and I don't know why I am still up. I should go to bed. Actually, I am going to go to bed, but I thought I should post a little somethin' somethin' before I hit the hay. Not that I have much to say, actually, you will probably find this blog not very witty (even if at times I wish very much that I could be), it's just me. This is my life. So, I will continue to tell you that it's late, I'm tired and I should go to bed. Ha, ha. Actually, you can only say that so many times because it's redundant and repetitive. It's redundant and repetitive.

P.S. I got a wishbone in the mail. Jealous?

Boxing Day (Christmas is Over)

"Take it all down
Christmas is over
Do not despair but rather be glad
We had a good year. Now let's have another
Remembering all the good times that we had
Oh no more lights glistening
No more carols to sing
But Christmas it makes way for spring
The hearts of men are bitter and weathered
As cold as the snow that falls from above
But just for one day we all come together
We showed the whole world that we know how to love
Oh remember that Christmas it makes way for spring"
-Relient K, Boxing Day

My mother and I went to Aberdeen today. Not to return anything, though, my mother doesn't like it when people return things the day after Christmas. Actually, I am also inherited my mother's opinion that you should always be grateful for any gift you receive and you should never return them. Maybe that's why white elephant gifts are so appealingly fun? Anyway, we went to Aberdeen and got mostly red on sale Christmas stuff that we can use for the Valentine's Banquet (I am going to be extra prepared this year, well, next year) and I got a couple things thanks to the wonderful use of gift cards.

On our way up to Aberdeen, it was super foggy. I do not at all like fog. It was think fog that made it hard to see the cars coming until they were right beside you. My mom said, "The sun isn't strong enough to get rid of the fog." It was funny, because I have always thought that fog was an amazing illustration about trusting God even when we can't see the next few feet in front of us. Because you know what? The sun isn't always strong enough, but man, the Son sure is always strong enough to help us through even when we don't know what the next step will be.

As for Christmas being over, it's weird. It means a new year is quickly approaching. And I know what this new year will bring: changes. Maybe not all at once, but I know 2008 will be a year of a lot of changes. My brother is going to graduate. I will start my senior year. I will be going to Africa for crying out loud. This year is going to be crazy. But in a good way. I know I should look at it more like this will be the year where God will teach and show me amazing new things. But I don't like change, I don't know if I am ready for all the changes 2008 will bring. I don't know if I want to celebrate New Year's Eve when it comes. I know I can't avoid it, but it's going to be hard to celebrate changes. I tell you what, I better not be by myself New Year's Eve or I will probably be bringing in the new year crying my eyes out. Ha, ha. I sound pathetic. I am going to try to end on a positive note. (More than just, hey, at least I'm being honest with you.) 2008, I will let God take me to places I'm afraid of. God is with me no matter what. I know God has a plan and I want 2008 to be the year where I am at the center of God's will for my life. God is in control. God is in control of my life, 2008, and my future. God will take me exactly where He wants me to go. Good or bad, bring it on.

Merry Christmas!

Today arrived. Christmas once more. You know, when you know the real reason for Christmas and you are celebrating Jesus's birth, Christmas isn't a letdown after you've opened all the presents. Isn't that amazing? I love Christmas. I got done serving at the Community Christmas dinner and it was once again quite fun. I didn't eat squash this year, because I'm smarter now.

Merry Christmas, everyone!
"And so this Christmas I'll compare the things I felt in prior years
To what this midnight made so clear
That You have come to meet me here
To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me
In the hope that what You did
That you were born so I might live
To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me"
-Relient K, I Celebrate the Day

P.S. This was my present from my brother. I love penguins, brothers, and inside jokes.

Year of the Grain of Salt

To “take something with a grain of salt” is to view a statement with a skeptical attitude. (The New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy, Third Edition.)

In common parlance, if something is to be taken with a grain of salt, it means that a measure of healthy skepticism should be applied regarding a claim; that it should not be blindly accepted and believed without any doubt or reservation. According to the Oxford English Dictionary "to take 'it' with a grain of salt" means "to accept a thing less than fully". (Wikipedia)

So, I've decided that 2008 will be the year (as if I haven't been before, which I have already been, but still) that everything that I see, hear, or read I will take with a grain of salt. Like, I really enjoy Relevant Magazine, but am a little hesitant when I received the magazine to see Rob Bell on the cover. I don't know. I don't want to stop reading all together, because I love some articles on the Relevant Magazine site and I love the podcast that they have. I don't know. Some things today aren't all the great, but I don't want to stop reading and being informed. That being said, here's some things I'm looking forward to their coming out in 2008:

Why We’re Not Emergent (By Two Guys Who Should Be) by Kevin DeYoung, Ted Kluck
Sanctus Real We Need Each Other - February 12th
Leeland Opposite Way - February 26th
Anberlin untitled [Universal] -- Summer
There will be more, I'm sure.

Merry Christmas Eve!

Squeezed for Jesus (and Windmills)

"And so when the words we sing are gone
God's blessing continues on
We laugh and compliment this
Merry Christmas"
-Relient K, We Wish You a Merry Christmas

You know what, this year has been a lot of things. I'm so grateful that I am right here. Because I know that I am right where God wants me. I received my local minister's license this morning in church. I invited my dad to church and he came. I thanked him for coming and wondered how long since the last time my father has been inside a church. I don't think this has really changed much of anything. But maybe I'm the only way my father will ever go inside a church again. That's a weird thought.

Other than that, Christmas season is so wonderful. There's something so happy and glowing. That's a silly way to describe it. I just love Christmas. Tonight a couple people shared what this year has meant. God has blessed me so much this year. 2007 has been a good year. Best year yet? Well, I have a feeling the best year yet has yet to come.

As far as something else goes, I will choose to select the good memories. There's no use to remember the bad. So, I will choose to remember the time where I had a complete break down and you were there, to listen and to tell me that I'm not ugly when I cry (even though I know I am horribly ugly when I cry). There's many more, I'm sure. But, I don't need to explain them all.

Here's something I never knew before: Bowling balls don't come with the holes in them, they need to have holes drilled in them. Isn't it sad that I didn't knew that, considering I work in a bowling alley? Anyway, I found this out last night and I was happy to know it. Ha, ha. It was an amazing piece of information. Insight, if you will.

My cat decided that she wants to sit on my lap, so she's making typing this post very difficult, considering my laptop is already on my lap. She's trying to learn how to use the keyboard. I'm not kidding. One word ended up in all caps and bolded. I love my cat. She decided to sleep on my wrist.


"So look at me now
Its finally Christmas and I'm home"
-Relient K, Merry Christmas Here's to Many More

Isn't it good to be home?