Hustling While I Wait

I almost dropped an axe on my foot yesterday. And that basically sums up my life lately.

My mom and I did a bunch of financial filling out forms stuff yesterday. That is depressing in and of itself. It is not too happy to read "This is a loan. You will need to repay this loan" over and over again. It is even more not too happy knowing that even after accepting the loan for the maximum amount, I will still not be able to afford college. It is really quite depressing. No matter what I do, I am going to graduate college underneath a huge pile of debt. And I don't even have any rich relatives that are going to die. I don't even have any rich relatives. Even if I did, I don't think I would want them to die, but I hope you get what I mean. I am going to be a college graduate with a whole bunch of debt. To make matters worse, I am going into the ministry. Which means that I will be a college graduate with a whole bunch of debt that is going into a field that does not make a whole bunch of money. On the bright side, someone going into the ministry should be the one to know that if God wants you somewhere, He will provide the resources to make it happen.

Also, I have been looking at cars to hopefully buy a car, but that isn't any happier. In fact, it was quite honestly stressing me out. I have broken out in stress rashes on both of my arms. I drove a couple cars at one place and let me just say that I don't like people who work on commission. They pressure you too much and make you feel like you have to decide. Right away. Then we went to another place and the guy was nice. Mom explained to him that I got stressed before and he said, "if car shopping isn't fun, you are shopping at the wrong place." I drove a car there and it fit and I loved it. However, it isn't something I can afford, but if I could, I would have no trouble deciding. I would choose that car in a heartbeat. Of course, that wouldn't make my dad too happy, because if I choose anything that isn't a Ford, he isn't happy. Don't get me wrong, I am a hardcore Ford person, too, but that car felt way more comfortable than Ford Focuses that I have driven. Anyway, I am getting a stress rash. And that's not too attractive.

First off, I want to say that the next pay period I am scheduled for a lot of days and I wanted to be scheduled for a lot of days because I need the money. Of course, that doesn't mean that I don't know that I will be incredibly tired and worn out from working a lot. I work 13 days straight. Today I have a day off and I won't have another day off until my birthday, actually. The16th. It is funny because I didn't even ask for my birthday off, because I just figured I would have to work it anyway, but I still got my birthday off. I don't really care much about my birthday, so I would have been okay with it if I had to work on my birthday, but I suppose working on your 18th birthday isn't ideal.

At least that axe didn't actually hit my foot. Maybe that's a sign that everything will be alright.